Boys are beautiful despite the fart jokes

I had three brothers and grew up on a farm which involved a lot of mud, cubby (fort) making and cow shit throwing. It was idyllic even with all that masticated grass getting around in your hair. I was called a tomboy. I wore shorts almost exclusively. My brothers didn’t leave me out of their … Continue reading Boys are beautiful despite the fart jokes

You are a mother now: Expectations are futile.

Maybe I'm a slow learner or just a bit stupid, but you'd think after being a mother for nearly seven years now, I'd KNOW that any expectations I have about what and how my kids will do at any given moment would be a little more realistic by now. Nope. Just stupid I guess. Once a week … Continue reading You are a mother now: Expectations are futile.

End of term Shit Storms

Warning: this post (obviously, from the title) contains a lot of swearing. When I was a teacher, the end of every term was hilarious not really. It's at this time, when teachers, usually a band of rock solid allies united in their front against shithead kids and anything which isn’t prescribed in their Teachers’ Union … Continue reading End of term Shit Storms

Five Indicators Your Child’s Teacher Hates You.

School dress up days. Is there anything more hateful? I’m totally down with teachers drawing a big fat middle finger on a handout in the shape of “DRESS UP DAY!!!” because they put up with all sorts of shitful shenanigans in that classroom. I’m with my daughter a lot and she is awesome but she’s … Continue reading Five Indicators Your Child’s Teacher Hates You.

The Toddler Trenches: Notes From The Other Side.

Warning: This contains the odd swear. At the weekend we were at party. Unlike the form of late it was a birthday party for an adult, but there were plenty of kids there and surprise surprise, a fair bit of stoned meerkat action the day after. Hazards abounded at this party- a bonfire, a creek … Continue reading The Toddler Trenches: Notes From The Other Side.

The day we broke our house.

Warning: contains the odd f-bomb. Okay, the title is misleading in by 'house' I mean campertrailer and by 'broke' I mean completely fucked. But what's a camping story without a few anecdotes of how it was all a bit awful so that all the non-camping folk can feel better about staying in a 3 and … Continue reading The day we broke our house.

Easter Camping with Children: The Pros and Cons.

We staycationed these Easter school holidays. The idea of overpriced and crowded accommodation, traffic jams and unrealistic expectations of a relaxing holiday with the kids have scarred us to the point where staying at home seemed like the most nurturing option. It wasn't always like this though. We used to be HUGE camping at Easter advocates. But … Continue reading Easter Camping with Children: The Pros and Cons.